Superpoop: 2014
Toothpaste For Dinner archives (by month):

2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2005: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2004: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2003: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2002: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
 

Toothpaste For Dinner comic: another superhero * Text: 

my super power is to eat all your food after i am done with mine
01-30-03

another superhero
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: pizza is a trap * Text: 

pizza is a trap because it tastes good and you eat it and then you are doomed
01-30-03

pizza is a trap
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: precious * Text: 

the place i moved into has a basement that looks like the silence of the lambs
01-30-03

precious
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: streetcordion * Text: 

if i do not get a job soon i will have to start playing the accordian on the street
01-30-03

streetcordion
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: the last altoids * Text: 

agh stomach pain


the last time i ever had altoids was one day when i was at home and was really hungry but i did not feel like going out so i just ate three boxes of them
01-30-03

the last altoids
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: all these arms * Text: 

all these arms and i still can't play scrabble by myself


not even the travel version
01-28-03

all these arms
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: donut magnet * Text: 

i am a donut magnet


if i get anywhere near them ZOOM they fly into my hands and mouth
01-28-03

donut magnet
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: i must test the mouse * Text: 

SALESMAN stand back i must test the mouse before purchasing!!!!
01-28-03

i must test the mouse
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: just make a scarf * Text: 

i am knitting myself a friend
01-28-03

just make a scarf
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: listening to the radio * Text: 

i just saw you listening to the radio!! you are hereby stripped of your indie glasses and sneakers
01-28-03

listening to the radio
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: do we live in norway * Text: 

do we live in norway and if not WHY IS IT DARK BY 5:00
01-26-03

do we live in norway
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: here is your changes * Text: 

HERE IS YOUR CHANGES NOW GOOD BYE


if the clerk at the convenience store would be nicer to me maybe i would not pay homeless people to poop on the floor there
01-26-03

here is your changes
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: p o box * Text: 

i really do not live in a PO box i just sleep there
01-26-03

p o box
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: this guy is so creepy * Text: 

SWM, 51, seeks M or F, any age, for companionship. insane. hobbies: starin', droolin', gettin' kicked out of places. lv msg in box #301 or just come to the local coffeeshop and i will be there. i will stare at you lecherously.
01-26-03

this guy is so creepy
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: waldo ohio * Text: 

there is a town in ohio called WALDO i am totally serious
01-26-03

waldo ohio
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: i should have moved * Text: 

i should have moved someplace where it never snows
01-23-03

i should have moved
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: laundromat part 1 * Text: 

TOO LEGIT


TOO LEGIT TO QUIT


SCHKLSSSSSSCHHHHH


the first time i went into the laundromat near the place i just moved into, the jukebox was playing MC HAMMER so loud the speakers were distorting so much it was almost impossible to tell what song it was
01-23-03

laundromat part 1
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: laundromat part 2 * Text: 

TOO LEGIT TO QUIT


so i sang along and danced
01-23-03

laundromat part 2
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: my new apartment * Text: 

oh jesus the door knob just came off in my hand


CUE THE LAUGH TRACK
01-23-03

my new apartment
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: now all i have to do * Text: 

now all i have to do is unpack and find a job
01-23-03

now all i have to do
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: chapstick * Text: 

chapstick for dinner
01-21-03

chapstick
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: i will star * Text: 

one day i will star in a movie where i hold up a boston terrier and it pukes into my mouth
01-21-03

i will star
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: merry christmas * Text: 

MERRY CHRISTMAS
01-21-03

merry christmas
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: my pants * Text: 

my pants are knitted from intestines
01-21-03

my pants
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: nooooo * Text: 

NOOOOO
01-21-03

nooooo
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: super hello * Text: 

SUPER HELLO
01-21-03

super hello
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: august 1995 * Text: 

RESUME: JOB EXPER. august 1995.


- facilitated customer service operations


- persuasive sales experience


- constructed complex digestible energy sources


- learned that mushrooms will stick to the ceiling if you coat them in ketchup
01-19-03

august 1995
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: our specials today * Text: 

our specials today are ignoring customers and being snippy
01-19-03

our specials today
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: tare pandrew * Text: 

i am TARE PANDREW!! sometimes i am floppy.


sometimes i am not so floppy


the most ever is nine
01-19-03

tare pandrew
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: when i draw pictures * Text: 

when i draw pictures the top left corner of the paper is always covered in scribbles because i have to make sure the ink in the pen is flowing before i start drawing
01-19-03

when i draw pictures
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: creepy coffee shop guy * Text: 

i hate being stared at by the creepy coffee shop guy
01-16-03

creepy coffee shop guy
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: i did not know he owned it * Text: 

you are face to face with the man who sold the world!!!
01-16-03

i did not know he owned it
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: talk so much * Text: 

so do you think it will be cold this winter? i don't think it will be too cold, mmmm man i guess you like french fries huh, you know what i like is the strawberry shake, it's


why do people talk so much
01-16-03

talk so much
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: trapped in spreadsheets * Text: 

trapped in spreadsheets
01-16-03

trapped in spreadsheets
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: waiting room television * Text: 

i put the car dealership waiting room television on BET and took the remote control home with me
01-16-03

waiting room television
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: hot and extra hot * Text: 

AGGGGH IT IS SO HOT MY EYES ARE BLEEDING


apparently the difference between
01-14-03

hot and extra hot
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: pirate dumping * Text: 

tis not ye, tis me!! arrr we can still be friends


pirate dumping
01-14-03

pirate dumping
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: severe angular bangs * Text: 

my severe angular bangs indicate i am an independent sassy alternative dateless girl!!!
01-14-03

severe angular bangs
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: the state of ohio * Text: 

dear drew,


we can not pay you for unemployment because that would mean that you could actually buy food to eat, and i mean we are not your mom or something dude


love, the state of ohio


p.s. get a job!!! your family is ashamed and you do not have a long enough beard to become a hobo
01-14-03

the state of ohio
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: your resume * Text: 

your resume looks good except i would put
01-14-03

your resume
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: bass car * Text: 

THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP!! I MAKE MINIMUM WAGE AND LIVE WITH MY MOM THUMP THUMP!!


i am a bass car
01-12-03

bass car
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: hidden track * Text: 

did you see the hidden track at the end of the play


what?


if you watch act V and then hit fast forward, the people come back out on stage and kill and eat each other
01-12-03

hidden track
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: making copies * Text: 

i hate having to make copies at work unless the copies are pictures of a CEO head on a naked body
01-12-03

making copies
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: save your receipts * Text: 

it is important to always save your receipts


so you can throw them away in one big bunch
01-12-03

save your receipts
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: the pot * Text: 

you are black
01-12-03

the pot
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: draining the lizard * Text: 

i am draining the lizard
01-09-03

draining the lizard
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: i try not to get injured * Text: 

so what have you been doing since you lost your job?


i try not to get injured


what


like sometimes i'll just stand under a doorway and brace myself


or make sure not to leave my bedroom
01-09-03

i try not to get injured
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: salsa band * Text: 

snozzz


donk donk donk


sometimes i fall asleep at my desk and have dreams about forming a salsa band except using office supplies instead of real percussion instruments
01-09-03

salsa band
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: tom waits * Text: 

clink clank growl useless unlistenable


i am tom waits
01-09-03

tom waits
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: worlds biggest soda * Text: 

it is the world's biggest soda!! but it does not come with a coaster so i will get yelled at by the world's biggest mom
01-09-03

worlds biggest soda
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: cut cut cut cut cut cut cut * Text: 

CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT
01-07-03

cut cut cut cut cut cut cut
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: hamster local 293 * Text: 

HAMSTER you can not go on strike you never do any work to begin with


what do you mean you are in the union
01-07-03

hamster local 293
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: low on the corporate ladder * Text: 

MAKE COPIES OF THIS ASAP


no matter how low on the corporate ladder you are, you can still be the boss of office machines
01-07-03

low on the corporate ladder
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: pink packets blue packets * Text: 

pink packets blue packets they are all the same!! when will scientists invent a packet that tastes like chili or fish or anything except sugar
01-07-03

pink packets blue packets
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: super complainer * Text: 

my super power is complaining so much that everyone in the world gets depressed
01-07-03

super complainer
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: any sort of device * Text: 

do you sell any sort of electronic device to repel loud neighbors??


i have tried a knife but that only worked temporarily
01-05-03

any sort of device
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: floppy pants * Text: 

thank god nobody wears these stupid floppy pants anymore
01-05-03

floppy pants
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: i will cut * Text: 

I WILL CUT YOU
01-05-03

i will cut
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: my uselessness * Text: 

i demonstrate my uselessness by naming inanimate objects and insisting on referring to them by their proper names
01-05-03

my uselessness
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: public transportation * Text: 

sometimes i like to lean against a pole and pretend like there is public transportation in this city
01-05-03

public transportation
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: anarchy * Text: oh i get it! anarchy means that you litter
01-02-03

anarchy
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: every time i move * Text: 

every time i move i just want to throw away everything i own
01-02-03

every time i move
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: internet detective * Text: 

i am an internet detective!! i will look you up and can discover everything about you using the internet! in fact, if i wanted-


DAMMIT MOM I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME I'LL BE UPSTAIRS IN A MINUTE
01-02-03

internet detective
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: listen to the blues * Text: 

why does everybody pretend that they actually like to listen to blues
01-02-03

listen to the blues
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: my torso and arms * Text: 

my torso and arms are misshapen DREW YOU WILL PAY!!!!!!!!
01-02-03

my torso and arms
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Toothpaste For Dinner archives (by month):

2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2005: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2004: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2003: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2002: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec